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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 7:07 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Thu May 23, 2013 2:21 pm
Posts: 8150
What wonderful news about Duke! It does sound like he was somewhere that he could not return home to you immediately! I'm sure he got lots of kitty hugs. Keep him close by from now on. I know you're sleeping and eating better now.


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 9:19 am 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Fri Feb 24, 2017 4:00 pm
Posts: 11
Thanks all and it's so lovely to have him back home with us again. He's eating well and enjoying lots of cuddles and tummy rubs!

Daisy however isn't so sure. I think she actually got used to being the only cat and she and Duke aren't getting on. He chases her and she hides away upstairs which is so sad. I will try the grooming wipes on both of them to see if we can get the scents the same but it's proving rather stressful.

They used to be quite independent but would play together whereas now it seems like Duke is trying to claim the house as his. Her personality has really changed since he's been back and she's definitely not happy.

Clare, I know you said it took Jagger a while to accept Hendrix when he came back. Any tips on how I can get them used to each other again?

Xx


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 9:52 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Joined: Sun Feb 26, 2017 6:05 am
Posts: 157
I'm so glad he's home. I was tearing up reading your posts. So happy for you.


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 10:45 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Sun Feb 02, 2014 8:11 pm
Posts: 1178
Hi Tanja

This is pretty much a reintroduction that you need to go through. They recognise each other by scent and their scents are now different and don't reflect the fact they are part of the same social group anymore. An excellent book to get is 'Cat v Cat' by Pam Johnson-Bennett.

As I said before, Jagger broke out of our cat flap the first night Hendrix came home. We didn't really have time to think and I tried to keep Hendrix in with us so I could deal with this in the morning, but Jagger was terrified, he didn't recognise Hendrix (he stank to high heaven) and was also making the most horrendous feral noise pretty much non-stop. He didn't sound like Hendrix at all. The next day, we found the cat flap dismantled and no Jagger. He came home eventually that day but was really stressed and upset, pacing around and growling etc. We kept them separate for most of that day, got the grooming wipes and gave Hendrix a good rub down which got him started on grooming himself.

We had Feliway plugged in too - there is the original one and also one now called 'Friends' which gives off pheromones that help cats to tolerate each other I believe. I still have a Friends plug in going now as we did have issues for a while but that was due to their becoming socially mature and there being a bit of a squabble over who was the alpha male.

To be honest, we were incredibly lucky as Hendrix kind of took matters into his own little paws. He really wanted to be friends with Jagger again and kept trying to play with him. Jagger was very growly and unhappy at first but as Hendrix took back on the scent of home and could be recognised again, he gradually gave in.

Like Daisy, although Jagger was desperately upset initially when Hendrix went missing, he had adapted to being the only cat and had got used to being able to eat treats in his own time without Hendrix swooping in and stealing them from under his nose which also caused some upset in the first few days. But within ten days, they were sharing a cat tree with no issues! I had just bought the tree before Hendrix went missing and Jagger wouldn't share it at all initially so didn't think he would ever share it after having it to himself for nearly three weeks. Again this was a case of Hendrix deciding he was getting in it no matter what. Jagger did give him a bash on the head for being cheeky but then settled in the bed below - it was like a minor miracle.

You may need to keep them separate and then swap bedding etc, swap areas and try to feed them together on opposite sides of the room if they seem to be more accepting of each other. Let them associate each other with good things, give them treats together etc. The book will give you plenty of direction on this.

They both need plenty of love and reassurance which I know you will be providing in spades, but you'll need to move at their pace to help them reintegrate etc. With two males as opposed to a male and a female, you have different dynamics going on and it could be that you are right and Duke is now very confident after his experience and trying to take full control of the house. In which case, a behaviourist may be required. Debbie Connolly on the Bengal Cat Helpline would be able to help you with this, she has certainly helped me. She specialises with Bengals and it really wasn't too expensive either.

Keep us informed as to progress - you will get there I promise! xx

_________________
Clare
Hendrix and Jagger, Brown Marble Boys (born 18 August 2013)
Hampshire, UK


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 4:22 pm 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Fri Feb 24, 2017 4:00 pm
Posts: 11
Hi Clare

That's really helpful and I thought that it would take time but good to have it reaffirmed. I've ordered some of the Feliway Friends diffusers so will plug those in around the house and hopefully that will help. We will get some of the grooming wipes too and see if that works and I've ordered the book so will have a good read through and follow Pam's direction! Also good to hear that Hendrix and Jagger sorted themselves out so I have hope that Daisy and Duke will do the same.

We don't know what sort of ordeal poor Duke went through so he could be going into a defensive mode which is why he might be acting the way he is so we will persevere and I'm sure with patience and time, we will establish harmony in the house again!

Did you take Hendrix to the vet when you got him back? Duke seems to be fine and I don't want to stress him out even further by dragging him off to the vet but wondering if we should get him checked out.

Thanks so much for the advice. It's really appreciated :)

xx


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 4:45 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Sun Feb 02, 2014 8:11 pm
Posts: 1178
Hi Tanja

It is really no problem - its incredibly stressful when they are missing and then a whole new stress arrives when you get them back! I'm very happy to help by sharing my experience.

I phoned the vet the morning after we got Hendrix back as he was so thin - he really wasn't good at providing for himself unfortunately! I was told not to worry about bringing him in and causing more stress and scent issues between the two of them. The vet went through with me what I feed him as I was wondering whether he should be put on a special high calorie food to help him gain weight. But I was told the food I fed him was good quality and just to feed him little and often. I did this for just over a week (I even did night feeds!) until I could get him back on a normal feeding schedule and he'd gained some weight. He had a nasty looking gash on one of his legs as well which I kept an eye on but it healed really well.

Fortunately I'd literally just done his flea and worm treatment the weekend before he went on his 'trip' so we didn't have an issue on that front.

Cat vs Cat is a great book for a multi cat household so I'm sure it will help. But, yes time and patience is key now. We know we were lucky how our two sorted themselves out, we honestly expected much worse problems as we'd had all sorts of issues leading up to this, and I'd just managed to get things back on an even keel with them - Jagger had been mercilessly bullying Hendrix before Christmas which was when I'd contacted Debbie Connolly for help. So I really didn't expect things to iron themselves out so easily.

I have everything crossed things settle down very soon for you guys as well - and then you can enjoy having Duke home again properly! xx

_________________
Clare
Hendrix and Jagger, Brown Marble Boys (born 18 August 2013)
Hampshire, UK


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 5:29 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Thu May 23, 2013 2:21 pm
Posts: 8150
Duke came home with a lot of different smells on him -- and Daisy probably was used to being the only kitty around again and claimed ALL the territory as her own. Now Duke is back! Ugh! The life with cats. It is hard at times. But .... hang in there. With time, things should get better for all of you.


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 Post subject: Re: Missing Bengal
PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2017 11:54 am 
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Bengal Cat
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Joined: Fri Jan 13, 2017 5:30 pm
Posts: 44
Just read the news! (Don't check forum frequently)

Fantastic - so relieved!!! and happy for you, hope household harmony resumes soon

Rob

_________________
Maximus and Augustus, our brown rosetted boys


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