Thank you all for your kind thoughts. I still can't believe it's happened. I'm signing off now, but may check in from time to time just to see how your babies are all doing. Thanks again and look after them, as you never know what tomorrow will bring. Good luck to you all and thank you again. Jo xx

Wowwww, I am sooo sorry to hear about this. RIP Oakley.

Hi everyone, it has been a while since I have been on here, unable to face the memories. However, I decided to have a look today and had a good cry when I re-read all these posts. I can't believe to this day that I trusted that vet. I should have sued him! We now have another baby, Charlie. He is a Bengal, but nothing at all like Oakley. That's not a bad thing though, as I didn't want to replace him, just to fill the massive void he'd left. Charlie is a babe; skinny as a draft excluder and the fussiest cat I've ever known. Even the slightest hint of illness has me panicking and running to the vet (a new one, I hasten to add!). I will upload a better photo of him, but this is very like him.

I hope you and your cats are all well and thank you again for your thoughts when Oakley died. I know it is silly, but it was lovely to think of you all at the time. It really did help to know that you all genuinely cared. Thank you,

Jo and Charlie

Oops, did something wrong with the attachment I think! Nope, it's too big. Will send one soon.

I was so sorry to come read this topic. I think we've all lost kitties and it's never easy! Thankfully, you've got Charlie now and I hope he's thriving!!!! You learned a grave lesson -- when your cat becomes lethargic, you rush it to the vet -- regardless of the hour of the day. We have a great clinic here that is open 24/7 and 365 days a year and many clinics who are open from 6 p.m. to 8 a.m.

God.....just read through the whole post, how unbelievably awful it must have been for you. We put our trust in the our vets and it sounds like they let you and Oakley down big time. He may have lost his life anyway but it must make you angry still to think the vet said it won't be life threatening. I have been a member on here for a year now with a rescue bengal. We had a dreadful experience with the death of our last cat who died on Nov 18 last year. He was a beloved black rescue moggie with bladder cancer. He had an operation to remove the tumour and to get it tested. He then came home and managed to get the sharp edge of the plastic cone dug into his stomach and opened up his incision. How Harry did it we will never know but we heard a yowl and thundering up the stairs. I followed a trail of blood and he was hiding under the bed with probably about two foot of his intestines wrapped around his legs. Thank god my husband was at home as I was meant to be driving him to the airport to fly to china that day. The vet was amazing and so calm. Harry would not let us get near him but the vet brought a grabber thing, scooped him up in a towel and the nurse carried his intestines next to him in plastic. He had lacerated a blood vessel to his intestines but not punctured the actual bowel. He had a second operation to put him back together. He came home five days later. He never ate again and just gave up, so two days after him coming home with my husband still in China we had the vet come back and let him go to sleep forever. I will never get over the fact that he spent his last week mostly in a vet cage. He had two days with us but to be honest it was not Harry anymore, his spirit had gone, but bless him he still used his litter tray perfectly even though he was ill. If I could turn back time I would have just never put him through all the pain of the ops. The results of the tumour came back the day after his second op. It was the most aggressive cancer possible and he would have only had a few weeks to live anyway. Please don't torture yourself thinking you could have done differently as I have for the past year. I have not, until today, told this forum what happened as I always felt guilty and could not think about it without feeling it was my fault he suffered. Reading your and Oakley's story has made me think about it again and realise we can only do our best and what we feel is right at the time. Sorry for the essay but it has been very cathartic for me. It has put a smile on my face to think of you with your new baby. Enjoy him!

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Melissa

UK
Oscar - Rescue (Rascal!!!) Bengal

I've just read this too. Have been missing for some time myself after losing my sweet Bengal Dexter at 9 months old to FIP.

I am so sorry for your loss. Think of how much you loved him and what a wonderful life he had with you that's what gives me comfort.

Will look forward to updates and photos of your lo.

Spitspot so sorry to hear about the awful ordeal you went through. Brought tears to my eyes ((hugs)).

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Oscar and Jasper (or one ear and two ears as dh calls them) black rescue mogges

RIP my sweet baby Dexter, Snow Bengal 19/5/14 to 5/3/15 and my lovely dear old friend Muskey, Brown Burmese put to rest aged 15 on 14/11/15.

Debbie

We all do our best for our fur babies and have to put our trust in the expertise of vets and rely on their advice and guidance.

Neither of you did anything wrong, I'm glad you changed your vet Jo, I'm not sure what he was thinking making a judgement without seeing Oakley. Looking forward to seeing pictures of Charlie and I wish you many happy years together.

Melissa, you acted on your vet's advice. There was always the chance it was fixable, hence the operation to find out. Your decisions were based on advice from your vet and love for Harry. Unfortunately the cancer was too aggressive, but Harry knew you loved him and wanted to help, you have absolutely nothing to feel guilty for. I really hope telling your story was indeed cathartic for you and you can finally forgive yourself. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. But if you hadn't gone ahead with the operation and you'd found out afterwards it could have been treatable, you'd still be beating yourself up. You can only do what you think best at the time.

Sending you both hugs (((())))

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Clare
Hendrix and Jagger, Brown Marble Boys (born 18 August 2013)
Hampshire, UK

Welcome back, Jor. I wish you and Charlie many happy years together! It's amazing how, even two cats in the same breed, can have such different personalities and quirks. :)

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Guardian of Zelda - Brown Spotted Bengal

Melissa, I am so very sorry you had to go through what you did! It must have been horrible. Poor Harry.

Thank you all and poor little Harry! It set me off crying again, but I'm so glad that you felt able to write about him, although, I will bet the tears were streaming throughout.
Charlie is such a baby; he was a retired stud, sacked after just 2 litters, but considering he wasn't even 2 when we got him, no wonder he was no good a his job. He was petrified of other cats, but is fine now.

I'm so sorry for Harry and Melissa.

Hullo Charlie

Super handsome boy!

I am so sorry to hear about Oakley.

I too know how guilty you feel, when I had my previous bengal frosty he had a funny tummy right from day one, then when he was around 2 it got really bad, he had diahorea constantly, I took him to the vets where they did a biopsy of his gut to find it was inflammatory bowel disease, he lost so much weight we thought we would lose him, then we started on a course of steroids and chemo tablets and slowly things got better, we went about another 2 years all well, going out for walks etc, regular very checks.

Then one day he was in terrible pain so I rushed him straight to the vet where they did an mri scan to find a section of his gut had burst and his belly was full of puss, we decided to operate if nothing else to find out what had happened.

The operation showed it had turned to cancer, they repaired his gut and had to washed out his belly once a day, things started to look better and his gut started to try to work again, but he wasn't the same, I took him home but he just hid all the time.

Then he started wetting in his bed, I knew it was time to let him go, the vet came to my house and did what he had to do, then I had him individually cremated and have his ashes in a lovely wooden box with a plaque with his name on.

I still feel guilty for doing what I know I had to, but I will never forget him, he was my first bengal, and have lots of pictures and memories

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Clare
Magic (brown spotted boy born 31 March 2012)
Pearl (seal Lynx Point girl born 1 October 2015)
Bristol, UK