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PostPosted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 5:48 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Have you tried playing with him with da Bird? A lot of playtime will likely help win his heart over. I would also give it plenty of time. Three weeks isn't very long and kittens change a lot as they grow.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 1:50 am 
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brianj12 wrote:
lalune93 wrote:
Furthermore, I am not dwelling on his shortcomings. Every day I am hoping to make progress, but have not seen any.


:lol: I rest my case.

No seriously, if you think that with all that pent up disappointment and frustration and anger and resentment that you express here, that NONE of that gets fed back to your cat... no way. You don't know cats then. They are emotional sponges.

Here's what I think is important for you to realize:

1. You could have picked any cat, from any breeder, and you chose him. The fact that he is like he is, is nobody's fault, but the fact that he isn't what you wanted is only one person's fault... YOURS.

2. Many bengal owners have the same experience as you have, mine was pretty similar to that as well (fast forward four years and this morning I woke up to Serafina greeting me back to conciousness, and rubbing up against me and jabbering and purring, letting me know that it would be acceptable to be lavished with petting this morning). The big difference is how they deal with it. Read through the forum and you'll see what I mean. Most people would be dwelling on how they can improve things, looking at all the positive things (your cat is healthy and gets along with other animals, that is also a form of socialization and is huge!) and at the same time bristling at any suggestions that their new baby is anything but perfect. Very very few people come to a cat forum to diss their own cat (unless he is pooing on their bed :lol: )

3. If you are determined to, you can blame your breeder for how your kitten is right now, but ten years from now, the way your cat is will be almost entirely determined by how you treat him and raise him. So it's time to start focusing on that.


Okay, I will admit that I overreacted in my previous post in response to you.

I realise now that I was just upset and frustrated because I had certain hopes and expectations for Zuki. I realise I must have displayed at least some form of negative emotion towards him which he must have sensed.

I know this is wrong and I should just take things slowly and appreciate the little progress I make with him.

I took a deep breath and told myself not to expect anything, just to be positive, happy, kind and patient towards him.

Last night I hand-fed him his dinner, which was fine and he had no hesitations eating from my hand. He also sat near me and begged for food while I cooked dinner, so I gave him some little pieces of raw steak. He also sat near me while I was eating dinner, sniffing at my plate, so I gave him another couple of little treats (bad, I know).

I played with him all night and he napped near my legs inbetween running around.

This morning I also gave him some treats and hand fed him his food and he climbed on top of me to inspect my breakfast. I have been giving him little, short pats and have no tried to pick him up. If he gets scared and runs away from me, I don’t follow him, instead I leave him alone and walk away until he comes to me again.

I have also taught him how to sit on command!

Having said this, I spoke with a reputable breeder in my country for some advice. She said Zuki has signs of not being well socialized. She asked me the name of the Zuki’s breeder and I told her. Her response was “This confirms my suspicions.”

I have also been sitting in our bedroom alone with him. First few minutes he meows to get out, but then he settles and falls asleep. I lay next to him, cuddling and petting him, which he was fine with.

I think all I had to do was change my outlook.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 2:33 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Unfortunately when kittens aren't socialized at a young age it is harder to get them to trust, but it will usually come with time. Sounds like you're making some progress already, keep up the good work.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 2:46 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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This is really sad about the socialization of the kitty! This is why people should do thorough research on a breeder. It's so important that the kittens have interaction with humans while they are growing. Not just with the breeder to check on the kittens. The best breeders integrate the queen and kittens into their home (this is why they usually do one litter at a time and not try to deal with multiple queens and litters of kittens). These are the breeders who are in it to breed the BEST kittens and not the MOST kittens. Now that you know your breeder did not socialize Zuki, you understand what he's going through. This is ALL new to him. He's not used to people. Now that you've stepped back a little, he will feel more confident around you. You cannot blame Zuke for any of this ... this is the fault of the breeder and nobody else. It's not too late for Zuki, but it will take some time. By now, he should know his name and may come to you if you call him. Just that fact that he wants to be around you is progress.

I know you'll hang in there and things will get better with time.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 3:10 pm 
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I know it's tempting to feed kittens treats off your plate, but that may lead him to demanding your food and get out of hand once he gets used to you. It's okay if you are alone, but if it becomes routine it will be hard to control when guests are over. I fell into that trap and meal time became a circus. They became so aggressive trying to steal my food!

Once they went onto a restricted venison diet I had to stop any treats and they don't beg for my food any more either. They totally ignore me while I have my dinner because they know they will not get any.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 3:13 pm 
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I'm lucky. My hubby keeps trying to feed Raiden table food but Raiden is not interested! It is better if you do not give them scraps of human food. It's fine to hand feed the kitty for a while, but he really needs to learn to eat out of his bowl.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 4:23 pm 
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Sounds like you have made a ton of progress! So happy for you and Zuki!


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 12:44 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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Just an update on little Zuki –

He is doing much, much better! He has become more trusting and much less scared of me.

When we first got him, as soon as we lifted him up off the ground, he would wriggle around and get his claws out and scratch us.

Now I am able to pick him up and carry him somewhere without him minding, and I can even cuddle him like a baby in my arms for 10 seconds or so until he wants to be put down.

I think that is progress!

He is being purry and enjoying head and back pats and scratches.

I bought him Da Bird and he absolutely loves it, he hisses and growls at it and does big flips through the air, it’s so funny to watch.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 4:17 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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See .... with time and patience things get so much better! Love the update.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 4:32 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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Sherry wrote:
See .... with time and patience things get so much better! Love the update.


Yes, definitely!

I think I was just caught up too much in my own expectations rather than putting myself in his paws and thinking about how he must feel, being taken away from the home he has known for all his life and his mother and siblings, and being put into an entirely different house with strangers.

He is a different cat. My other cat is a rescue – she spent months sitting in a cage alone. Of course she was happy and relaxed as soon as we brought her home, sitting in the sun and letting us stroke her belly. She got a huuuge upgrade. Zuki on the other hand thought he already had a home! He didn’t know such a big change was ahead of him.

Anyway, I am just really happy that he is slowly becoming more and more confident with us.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 6:32 am 
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I'm very glad that this seems to be heading towards a happy ending, and a budding friendship. It sounds like you are now appreciating the bengal in him, and seeing that for what it is.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 6:55 am 
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brianj12 wrote:
I'm very glad that this seems to be heading towards a happy ending, and a budding friendship. It sounds like you are now appreciating the bengal in him, and seeing that for what it is.


I am, Brian!

He is very different to an average cat, and every cat is different. No matter how much research you do, every cat is an individual, every cat is different and no amount of information can tell you enough about the cat you will end up with. They’re all different in their own way. Some make themselves at home right away and purr away next to you, others hide and stay scared for longer.

It is so rewarding to know that he is learning to trust me. From going to not wanting to me patted, to rubbing against my hand when I stretch it out and running to me when I get home from work.

He used to be very rough with his teeth and claws and hurt us right away if we touched him somewhere he didn’t want us to, or if we gave him a pat while he was playing. Now he doesn’t bite or scratch us (not on purpose, at least, not with the intent to hurt) and when he play fights he only bites gently.

When I pat him he looks at me and he actually looks like he has a little smile on his face – it really warms my heart.

I bought him a lovely walking jacket from Butterfly Cat Jackets and I can’t wait to take him outside for some outdoor adventures :)
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Here is a photo of us taking a nap together.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 2:53 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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What two beautiful creatures!!! You learned a huge lesson and it's made a tremendous difference in Zuki. Getting him used to a harness and a leash and taking walks will solidify your bond. At times, he may just want to sit and rest and it's a great time for you to be together. Hopefully, he'll love the walking jacket, although be prepared that he may fight it, so putting it on him and just letting him wear it around the house first is the best idea. Once they get used to the jacket or harness, they are ready to venture outdoors. Hope your other kitty won't be jealous of that! People do walk their moggies -- one family walks theirs with their three dogs.

Thank you for being patient and trying to put yourself in Zuki's paws. The picture of the both of you is really indicative of how far he has come! Congratulations. You've gone a great job.


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