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 Post subject: Brilliant
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 10:39 am 
Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Mon Aug 21, 2006 9:29 am
Posts: 471
Location: Blackpool
Sorry if this offends. Please tell me and ill remove if it does but couldnt resist.

Actual letter to the Canadian Passport office

Dear Mr. Minister,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows

that I bought a t.v. cable from them back in 1997, and yet, the Federal

Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand?

My birth date you have on my social insurance card, and it is on all the

income tax forms I've filed for the past 30 years. It is on my health

insurance card, my driver's license, on the last eight goddamn passports

I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill

out before being allowed off the planes over the last 30 years, and all

those insufferable census forms that are done at election times.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name

is Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely astounded if

that ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!


I apologize, Mr. Minister. I'm really pissed off this morning. Between you

an' me, I've had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my

house, then you ask me for my fuckin' address. What is going on? You have

a gang of Neanderthals assholes workin' there!

Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to dig up

Yasser Arafat, for **** sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a

sandy beach.

And would someone please tell me, why would you give a **** whether I plan

on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do

something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure

as hell not want to tell anyone!

Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of the city

and get another fuckin' copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60


Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to

assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day??

Nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us

running all over the fuckin' place like chickens with our heads cut off,

then find some asshole to confirm that it's really

me on the goddamn picture - you know, the one where we're not allowed to


(fuckin' morons)

Hey, you know why we can't smile? We're totally pissed off!

Signed - An Irate fucking Canadian Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to

confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776

when one of my forefathers took up arms against the

Americans. I have served in the military for something over 30 years and

have had security clearances up the yingyang.

I was aide de camp to the lieutenant governor of our province for ten

years and I have been doing volunteer work for the RCMP for about five


However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am - you know,

someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN COMMUNIST fucking


Hamilton , Ontario Canada


 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 11:00 am 
I couldn't possibly someone who works in local government ;-)

(luckily my job doesn't normally inspire such extreme reactions from the locals though!)


 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 11:03 am 
Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Thu Aug 02, 2007 6:55 pm
Posts: 237
Location: Cheshire, UK
He now works for the Canadian Tourist Board :wink:




 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 12:23 pm 
Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Sun Sep 09, 2007 9:46 pm
Posts: 1499
Location: merseyside UK Earth - The Stratasphere
excellent Tracey.. couldn't stop giggling..
so true..
on so many levels.. :lol: :lol:

 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 8:33 pm 
Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Mon Oct 22, 2007 11:17 pm
Posts: 165
Location: Devon UK
Fantastic! Its so true when you think about it.

Paul and Theresa Benson
of Bengalcharm
Find us on twitter @Bengalcharm

 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2008 12:30 am 
Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Wed Sep 12, 2007 1:55 pm
Posts: 8421
Location: south east england
very true indeed, what a lot of us think but not many dare to say :lol: :lol: :lol:

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