I had the same experience as you. When I got my two sisters as kittens, they had so much fun playing with each other, and were a great comfort to each other in making the transition to their new home, that I was kind of taken for granted, and neither of them were all that affectionate. But that did change over time. One "breakthrough" for me was when I learned how much Serafina liked to play with fishing-rod types of toys, and how receptive to petting she was afterwards. That made a huge difference in terms of bonding. Now 6 years later, Serafina is actually a pretty cuddly cat. She comes to me several times a day wanting to cuddle. Gaga has her moments now too. In fact right now I'm laying of my side on my bed, with Gaga pressed up against me silently. She came for some petting and love.
So I guess my suggestions are:
1. Just keep bonding with them in general. Understand the things that make them really happy and focus on those things. Now is the time to be selfless, they are just babies. You have many years to go with them, and they grow up and change. 2. Be patient and don't push it. Try to avoid the negative interactions. Think of your interactions with them as filling up a bucket with water. Every positive interaction adds a little water to the bucket, every negative one (from their perspective) drains some out. If they don't want to be picked up, don't pick them up. If they don't want to be petted, don't pet them. etc. 3. Use your "secret weapons". Yea, they love playing with each other, put you can offer them things that they can't get from each other. One really big one is that you can mimic prey better than they can. For example, for my Serafina that meant breaking out the wand toys and mimicing birds and mice. I can give her the full hunting experience: Stalk, pounce, chase, and kill, and even give her a treat afterwards. For Gaga that meant throwing straws and little soft bouncing balls for her to streak after, catch, and retrieve. She wants to do that endlessly, even 6 years later. 4. I've heard that clicker training can also be a really unique, fun, and effective way to bond too. 5. When they become a little more inclined towards affection, "cheat" a little. I'll drape a wool afghan over my lap when sitting down often, and have a cat in it minutes later. Plush cat beds on the sofa or on the bed next to me also fill up quickly. And heating pads when the weather get cold always contain sleepy, purry cats pretty much instantaneously.
_________________ The little monsters 3
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