Number one and number two
![:rolleyes: :rolleyes:](./images/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif)
Such undignified names for cats, that really can't help the bonding process! Seriously! It's like they have no identities to you yet. How can you expect to bond with a cat who shares a name with poo poo?
Also, as Sherry said, why are they under a couch in a busy room if they are so afraid? You are not doing them any favors by doing that, and that will likely prolong the time it takes for your scare-dy cat to feel comfortable. Also, be careful with the whole eye-contact thing. Holding eye contact with a cat is actually a hostile act. It's seen as a challenge. It's what a cat does to another cat right before he launches a vicious attack.
My one other comment is: what does it really matter how much time it takes your timid kitty? Is there a deadline? Lets say it takes a month, two months? three months? six months? I mean you could potentially have him for 15-20 years. Whatever time it takes him, it's kind of small potatoes in the bigger scheme of things, so I wouldn't be so concerned over that.
One more: I think the visit to your vet probably told you more about the vet than the cat (you already knew your cat was not yet well acclimated to people, and a vet office is arguably the most stressful situation possible for a cat). If a vet doesn't have a good rapport with both myself and my cats, that's a good signal to look for another vet. It sounds to me like not only was he insensitive, but also handled the visit poorly. I'd dump him.