My boyfriend and I recently purchased a 4 month old Bengal kitten from a breeder. When we went to pick her up we noticed that her and all of her siblings seemed very nervous of people, but we assumed it was just because they were getting used to being without their mother and we were strangers to them. We are currently keeping her confined to our bedroom as our family house is quite large and we also have two other older cats in the house. Our kitten has a crate with all of her bowls, litter tray and some toys in but we have slowly been moving those into the room to try and encourage her to come out. She is fully vaccinated.

We have had her for 4 days now and she is still petrified of absolutely everything. She has plenty of places to hide in our bedroom yet whenever she comes out of her crate she is super skittish and walks with her stomach almost touching the ground. She will not come anywhere near myself or my boyfriend and it is very difficult for us to pick her up if we need to move her from somewhere. She has only just started to come out and explore the bedroom but only at night when we are both sleeping. She is eating fine in front of us (if we don't make eye contact with her) and she does use her litter tray but only for peeing, she does her other business anywhere else in the room except her tray. She will not play with any of the toys we bought her unless we are out of the room. We believe she was never socialised by the people who kept her before as she shies away from any human contact and has a terrified look whenever she looks at us.

I understand that it can take a while for a kitten to adjust to their new home, however she is almost 5 months old and we cannot keep her shut in one bedroom forever. I am going to University in just over a month and my boyfriend is going back to work soon after (he will be working 8pm - 6am and sleeping nearly all day) therefore she will be alone very often. We were hoping to have integrated her into the rest of our family and the house before this point so that she will never have to be alone (one member of the family is always in the house 24/7) however at this rate it is looking like she'll either have to continue being shut alone in one room or we will have to give her away. I'm sure she can become a lovely family cat so we do not want to have to do this, but to stay in our family somehow we need to get her to stop being so afraid of anyone and everything so that we can introduce her to the rest of the rooms in our house, the garden, our two other cats and the 3 other members of our family (all adults).

Any advice appreciated! Thanks

First of all, welcome to our wonderful forum. Congratulations on your baby! Please know 4 days is not long at all for a newbie to get accustomed to a new home. A lot depends on how well socialized she was at the breeder's. If she did not have a lot of human contact, it is going to take her a while to settle in a new home.

You have to be patient! The little one will go at her own pace. Having other cats in the house compounds the issue a little bit. She is a tiny thing ... and now with all the new smells, including new cats, it can be overwhelming to her.

You need to be spending as much time with her as she will allow. You don't have to handle her, but talk to her, get down to her level by sitting on the floor. Try to engage her in play with wand toys. She is currently lacking confidence and is not comfortable in her new home yet. That can change simply overnight at some point. Please don't you stress out over this as the kitten can sense this. Make sure your other cats are kept away from her for the time being.

You are talking about a month before you have to return to school. So much can change and happen in that time. You've got to have the patience and the confidence to deal with this. She will come around, but it can take a few weeks. You've already said she will come out after you go to sleep. That is something. She's exploring and gaining confidence. Hang in there -- and keep trying. And keep us posted.

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The little monsters 3

It sounds like she hasn't been handled very much at the breeders which can happen especially when they have a lot of kittens. Get some Feliway it works wonders in calming them down and helping them adjust. Otherwise just do what was suggested above sit in the room with her let her come to you, practice slow blinking at her until she blinks back which means she's comfortable around you. Don't try picking her up that will set you back, some cats need to do things on their own terms and you are huge to her. She will adapt and get used to you but it takes time and you allowing her to make the decisions don't force her.

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- Sarah
Arya 24/04/16 - Seal Lynx Point Rosetted Bengal
Griffith 16/04/16 - Silver Seal Lynx Point Rosetted Bengal
Mina (in my avatar)- 1999-2016 - Seal Mink Spotted Bengal (Snow) - run free at rainbow bridge

That is not uncommon. Four days is not that long. I adopted two kittens and they hid from me petrified for three days. Around the fourth day they started to come out a little and then very quickly from there they were jumping up and down on me like I was the best toy ever. They were very frightened and they had each other for comfort. It might take your new baby a little longer to feel at home, but it will happen. Soon your kitten will be meeting you at the door when you come home.

Hoping we can get an update on how things are going.

don't know if this is still relevant but try offering boiled chicken and just wait for them to follow their nose

i used that to break the ice with leo