Hello all,

I just adopted a 16 week old bengal kitten three days ago from a breeder. I've been looking for one for so long now, and I finally decided to get one. The first two days I had him set up in the bathroom so he could familiarize himself with the smells of his new surroundings, and so I wouldn't introduce him to my one year old cat too fast. He seemed kind of skittish but was so friendly once I called him to me. He would purr and love all over my boyfriend and I while in the bathroom. Yesterday he seemed like he wanted to venture out of his safe room, so I let the door open to see if he wanted to go out. He has been roaming freely around my apartment for the last two days but is acting more skittish now. He will meow at me, but won't come to me whenever I call him. If I talk to him and advance towards him slowly he takes off in the other direction. I will hold him and he wants to free himself. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I know it was probably too soon to let him out of the bathroom, but my apartment is smaller and he seemed ready to come out. How do I get him to come to me? What do I need to do now?

Thank you so much in advance for any help given!

Aimee, welcome to the forum and congratulations on your bengal. Safe rooms are to protect the new kitten and to allow it time to acclimate to a new environment. Usually they are in a safe room for as long as two weeks. This is to also keep any infectious diseases from spreading to your other kitty. Sometimes new kittens come to their new home with something.

That being said ... patience is the key! I think you are worrying for nothing. It takes time for a new kitty to adjust. He has been snatched away from his mom and siblings and an environment -- the only environment he ever knew. Now he's with new people, in a new room, new smells, another kitty smell. It can be overwhelming. It is natural for him to feel terrified (which is why the bathroom feels SAFE for him). Introducing him to your other kitty should have been a long and slow process, starting with scent swapping. But, now you've allowed him free access around your home. He's a little bitty thing in a big world. So, let him go at his own pace. He may run and hide -- that's okay. He may not want to be approached by a huge giant -- that's okay. You do want to get down to his level and talk with him, try to pet him, engage him in play time. He needs to build up his confidence in his new surroundings. Bengals are not like any other cat. But, give this some time. You'll see improvement in baby steps. Make sure you have at least one tall at tree for him to climb. Make sure he is able to escape your other kitty -- and that your older kitty has an area where it can be safe. Supervise the kitties when they are together and do not leave them alone until you are certain they are best friends. Things will not improve overnight, but you will see improvements over time, if you handle this the right way. Keep us informed and good luck.

Thank you so much for your reply Sherry! I put him back into the bathroom last night and his whole attitude changed. He turned back into the sweet loving kitten that I brought home. He was purring and seemed a lot more comfortable, so I guess I should leave him in there for a while longer. I just felt guilty leaving him in the bathroom :(. I went in there this morning and he was so happy to see me. Purring and talking to me, so I think you are right, I am worrying for nothing. I will keep him in the bathroom for a while longer then.

When I brought my guys home I had a room prepared for them - tree, food , water, litter box, feliway... I live on my own and don't have any other animals so the "only" issue was to calm them and getting them used to me. Also, downstairs my house is pretty much open space and that would have been too much for them to begin with.

After two days, with me at home most of the time, they seemed curious enough to se more so we went downstairs. They explored, played a little, then went to sleep on one of the armchairs they love so much now. I went to the kitchen to prepare dinner and when I came back they were sat underneath the table in the corner of the living room, not looking too brave. I realised it was probably too early, despite their initial confidence, so we went back upstairs for another day and they were ok.

On the following morning I left the room door open and we started exploring the place again. This time they were fine but I still confined them to their room for two more nights (or three, can't remember) for their comfort. So I guess taking it easy and adjusting as you go is a good way to make them feel comfortable with their new environment _in time_.

On the other hand.. their cuddliness also can vary so I wouldnt be automatically alarmed. My girl Lily is always happy to approach me and have a scratch, although forget picking her up or having her in my lap - she's too busy for that . The boy, Noha, on the other hand, likes to play with me and comes running to the door along with his sister when I come back from work but he's not at all the cuddly type, in fact even retreating slightly from my reach at some occasions like a boy who doesnt want to be cuddled by his (grand)mother.. "Hey, I'm a man... don't treat me like a little kid.." . Just stick to your kitty´s conditions and don't push anything and you'll be fine

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Thomas

Lily & Noha - Oct 7th 2015

I think there are (should be) way way bigger concerns right now than whether your cat will come to you when called. Cats are not dogs. They don't go around wondering how they will make their human happy today, or what acts will further endear themselves to their human. And whether or not your cat comes when calls really doesn't say much about the bond that you have or don't have. Getting a cat to do something you want them to do is a matter of motivation. When I call my cats, they carefully assess the context of my call, and if they believe coming will result in something that they want at that particular time, then they come. If not, they don't.

It's going to be some time before he fully trusts you, and associates the name you have chosen for him with himself. If this really is important to you for some reason, wait a few weeks, then get some treats and learn to use a clicker. There are lots of videos of that on youtube plus some good books on the subject.

P.S... are you really sure you want to keep your cat in the bathroom so he can acclimate to the smells?

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The little monsters 3

I'm not concerned at all about him coming to me calling him, I just wanted to make sure it was normal for him to run into hiding like that. I'm very familiar with cats, so I am not trying to make him please me, I am just simply asking about their behaviors since I'm a first time Bengal owner.
And unfortunately I don't have any other option about the bathroom, due to living in a one bedroom apartment for the time being.. I would love to put him into a huge room all on his own but I just don't have that opportunity right now.

Thank you all so much for the help I truly appreciate it.

Aimee, feel free to bring your little one out into the open when you are home. Obviously, you can pick him up and carry him into the living room and put him in your lap and give him lots of pets and attention (maybe even treats). He obviously feels safer in the bathroom. You will have to do the introduction to your other kitty. I know many cat owners think they bring home the kitten, sit it down on the floor and immediately engages the other cat or cats in play! Nope! Nope! Cats have the keenest sense of smell and smelling another cat will bring out hissing and possible aggression, so it has to be supervised and it has to take some time. Your little gal is still a bit overwhelmed, but that should wane as she gains confidence and becomes more comfortable in her surroundings. As you saw, she is much happier where she feels safe. If you feel she will find a place to hide if you bring her out -- cover the openings. You are her protector right now.