Hello all,

I really need help, I'm at my wit's end!

I'm 8 months pregnant and we've got 2 Bengal cats, brother and sister, two years old now. Spayed, house cats, playful and attention loving, but I've always taken great care of them and they have been great!

Lately though, almost two months now, they've been acting very strange. First of all, they have problems with closed doors -- even when I go to the bathroom and close the door behind me, they meow outside the door until I come out (especially the female).

Then, about a month ago, they started waking us up in the middle of the night, for no reason! They never slept in our bed (gives my husband allergies to have cat hair on the pillows and sheets), but it was never a problem, but now they systematically wake us up every night, even if they have food, toys, litter, everything! Mostly the female, but the male does as well, now.

I'm going crazy here, I sleep badly as it is and with the baby coming soon, I don't know if I can cope!

I tried playing with them before bed, I give them attention all the time, as soon as I wake up, and I work from home so they are with me all day, but nothing helps!

Please advise! Next step is finding them a new home with a less pregnant owner. I'm afraid it will get worse when the baby comes!

I can tell how stressed you are just from your post. Your kitties can sense that stress as well. First of all, bengals are vocal! Very vocal. If yours have been fairly quiet until now, you're lucky! Second of all, bengals love to follow their humans around. They are quite attached to their owners. And most cats hate closed doors! They are independent and want to go where they want to go -- and if a door separates you from the cat, they want to be right there with you.

Who gets to sleep through the night with their cats? Not me! Never happens. Raiden wakes me up once during the night and I get up to feed him and he is up at the crack of dawn ready for some playtime. Once the baby arrives (congratulations, by the way), your sleep pattern will completely change. I'm guessing your furbabies sense there is something different about you. Bengals, especially, are quite perceptive. You'll have to see how they are around the baby.

Re-homing should not be an option. So many pet owners give up too easily. What you're describing is simply normal bengal behavior. Just know that once the baby arrives, your priorities will change and the kitties will get less attention, which could end up causing some behavioral issues. Some cats accept a new arrival just fine. Most soon-to-be moms stress over the "what if's" after the baby is born.

I'd keep the kitties away from the baby's room for a while. They are going to notice a new smell and a new cry in the house and they will be curious. But, you need are going to need time to recover from the birth and give that baby a chance to grow a little bit. First introduction should be very short -- but I'd definitely still keep the kitties out of the baby's room. Interaction with the baby should take place in another room.

You've got a lot on your plate right now. Hope your hubby is willing to take on more responsibility with the kitties. It's great that he allows them even though he is allergic to them. Know that this is the place to come with questions.

I hope everything goes well for you, the baby, and the kitties.

One of mine always wants to be in the bathroom with me, I have to run in there to try and get the door closed or he's trying to get in the toilet! However, if this is new behaviour, I think they have sensed the change in you and possibly are unsettled or even feel you may be vulnerable and are wanting to protect you, and as such want to be with you at all times. Probably far fetched, but animals are very intuitive.

Where do your kitties sleep at night, are they trying to get in the room with you at night? Are you able to confine them to an area away from your bedroom? They won't like it if they usually have the run of your house, but getting some sleep is important to you right now as you'll be getting even less when the baby arrives! Failing that - ear plugs?!

I was watching a programme about cats last week and there was a pregnant woman on there trying to prepare her cats for the change when the baby came so it wouldn't be such a shock to them. She was playing a baby crying to them regularly so they were used to the noise, and also introducing the baby furniture so they wouldn't be trying to investigate it when the baby had arrived. She also introduced additional high spaces for them to escape to if they were worried at all. All of this being done in advance of the baby so they would take it more in their stride once the new arrival turned up. Might be worth a try to make things easier when the baby comes home.

Best of luck.

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Clare
Hendrix and Jagger, Brown Marble Boys (born 18 August 2013)
Hampshire, UK

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The little monsters 3

I have to say I know exactly how you feel. I am a mom of four and have had many MANY sleepless nights and the last thing you want is your cat's screaming the walls down at 2 in the morning. There has to be something going on that has them disturbed. Have you started to bring in new furniture for the baby or change things around? It could be as simple as a room being blocked off or something new that they haven't been allowed to investigate. Or possibly a new neighborhood cat that's lurking outside at night. You never really know until you get into detective mode and search for the answer. I had the same problem with Jasper, my big olé loud boy. He went 3 weeks crying all night and I couldn't figure out why. It finally hit me and I realized what it was. I had moved a chair in my living room from one side of the room to the other. Apparently it had him all worked up and he was letting me know it.
I don't think right now would be the time to decide to re home them. Making decisions that involve two living beings that obviously care for you should be done with a calm level head. Take some time, gather yourself, and try to see past this gloomy cloud over your head.

Eta: Brianj is absolutely correct, kids and bengals are a great combination and create the best entertainment one could ask for! Give it some time and maybe look into it a little more with an open mind. Perhaps a new cat tree or comfy heated beds will satisfy them through the night, especially if you place them closer to you!

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Hi there I really feel for you as it's very difficult with your circumstances changing so dramatically and having such demanding kitties at the same time.

I agree with Tabitha. I saw the same programme and thought what a great idea. Maybe playing music of a baby crying and preparing in advance is a very good idea particularly for our very clever and sensitive Bengals. This lady was well organised! She foresaw the difficulties with having a baby and then toddler (I think she was a cat behaviourist?) and had installed high places for her cats to escape to if the toddler got to much for them.

She also prepared for the baby having all the baby equipment around the house so that the cats became accustomed to it and also went as far as getting baby clothing such as socks and rubbing the cats cheeks on them to transfer scent. She also did this with the baby equipment too such as 'bouncy chairs'.

May seem mad but when you think about it, it makes complete sense to prepare as much as you possibly can now before the baby arrives.

I think that with being pregnant you have definitely changed your routine without realising it (but your Bengals very sensitive have definitely picked up on that and it's making them anxious.

As for 'closed doors' I think you should try and accept that many cats and in particular Bengals want to be where their owners are. Cutting them off from you is going to upset them and in turn make life more difficult for you so let them be with you it's easier for everyone.

My Bengal follows me everywhere. I can't even go to the toilet without him scratching outside the door to come in! If I have the kitchen door closed and he is outside he will fling himself heavily against it. He wants to be where I am and where the action is! To be honest though that's what I love the most about him

Good luck I really hope you can find a solution to make you all happy.

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Oscar and Jasper (or one ear and two ears as dh calls them) black rescue mogges

RIP my sweet baby Dexter, Snow Bengal 19/5/14 to 5/3/15 and my lovely dear old friend Muskey, Brown Burmese put to rest aged 15 on 14/11/15.

Debbie