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Any further personal remarks/insults may result in the removal of any offending member without warning.

Please try and act in a civil and adult manner and keep posts constructive.

This is so entirely out of control.

I live in a ONE br apartment with an f1 and an SBT, both males. I have NEVER had a problem separating the two if need be, because truth be told where there is a will there is a way and if it's what's best for your animals you really take in all of the intelligent and sound advice out there and brainstorm what you need to do to fix the problem, rather than being argumentative. My boyfriend and I used to actually take turns spending time with each of them as they were separated because we didn't want either of them to feel lonely. We spent less time with each other as a result, simply because we needed to bandage an introduction gone wrong (by being too quick about it) that resulted in one of our boys getting very stressed out and ill. People who want effortless fixes make up excuses and automatically go to re-homing as a solution because they do not have the patience and understanding needed to get to the root of the problem in the first place. It seems like that's what is going on here. Despite personal insults spotted here and there if you are willing to set your pride aside you have gotten some REALLY good advice in the midst of everything else. With your completely vulgar responses it baffles me why they are continuing to try and explain themselves, and in turn help you out, but to each their own.

Your kitty had behavior and toileting problems and you decided against better judgment to bring in another cat. You really have no choice here but to consider that your pattern of actions may have lead up to the situation you find yourself in now. I think you really have some backtracking to do to find out specifically where things went wrong and what you need to do to fix everything that has transpired since then, starting with Ail's problems from way back when. If you cannot put hurt feelings aside to follow some sound advice and take the time and effort needed to do some trial and error, then yes, I am sad to say re-homing WOULD be your best option. That is just fact and there is really no need for you to get upset about it. Decide how you want to proceed and what's next for you and your cats because the longer they linger around each other building resentment and being unhappy with each other's company, the more difficult it is going to be to correct this sort of behavior and sort this mess out. Good luck.

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tephiestephie... i SAID i would consider separating them IF feliway does NOT work. And so far it IS working and there ARE improvements.

my friends tell me horse forums are rude and nasty, rat forums are rude and nasty, and apparently so are cats. thats the thing with forums, everyone thinks they know everything and are right about everything, its just the way forums are and apparently I've learnt that the hard way.

i will not comment further about this topic and i will not rehome my cats and i will not be coming on these forums again.

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Well this was a good entertaining night time read!!

The only thing that bothers me about this thread is the amount of inconsistencies between the original post and the follow up posts. Follow up posts all contradict the original post! It really is quite concerning.....

I did deviate from recommendations on the forums regarding introductions and yeah whilst it's gone good I still have one slight issue with one of them but I don't believe that the introduction is to blame.

Feliway will help alleviate issues but believe me it's only a short term solution. My vet recommended medication for stress/anxiety (anti depressants) and I did not like the side effects one bit even tho I knew eventually she would get used to them and the side effects go, I refused to give her to them as one vet admitted she did have a slight adverse reaction. I would choose to have the blood tests to find out if there is anything going on. You should have pet insurance (I hope) so the cost shouldn't be an issue, hell even if you don't. It still shouldn't be an issue! I'd do anything to know my girls are ok and I do! So far Lilly has cost £5000 to petplan and has personally cost me around £500-£1000 and she's only 8 months old! I've had her 4 months.

Fact is, you need to have blood tests done on your cat to eliminate any potential health problems. If there are none, then you need to work on creating a relaxing environment for her. Lots of hiding places, time out, stimulation with toys and lots of love.

But to ignore having the blood test, you could, potentially be putting your cat through pain/discomfort for a longer period of time.

I hope that all makes sense?

Just in case you haven't really gone and you are still reading... ailurophile, I hope you understand that the only reason I (or anyone else, I think) ever even recommended rehoming was because YOU, the owner, are the one who brought it up first. Well I guess, as you said, "get rid of" (which is even harsher and more unappealing than "rehome"). Generally rehoming is the LAST thing members of this forum want to recommend, but when it's the OWNER who says it first, that shows that there's clearly a problem. It shows a lack of commitment on the owner's part. So when you're the one who brings it up, especially in the title of the thread with the words "get rid of", as if your cat is an old pair of shoes, it makes the situation look hopeless and makes you look like you're not really willing to put in the effort and do whatever it takes to keep your cats happy. I know it may look like everyone's "attacking" you, from your point of view, but that's really not the case. As others have already said, we can only respond to what YOU say here, not to whatever else you may be thinking in your head.

First you say things are so bad you may have to "get rid of" one of your cats, but now you say everything's great, your cats are happy and healthy, and you'll NEVER rehome them. Yeah, that's pretty inconsistent. Total flip-flop... And only in 3 days. Were you really able to solve all your cats' problems in 3 days, without taking a shred of advice from anyone here? I'm sure most of us here have no idea what to really think about you and your situation, especially after this crazy thread. But still, everyone wants to help. I think that shows it's always the cats' best interest we have at heart. So please, try not to be so defensive and malicious towards everyone. When all the people here are trying to do is help your cats, it can be very frustrating on our end too, you know. I wish your kitties good luck and a happy/healthy life, no matter what you decide to do.

*edit* And just to reiterate, I too strongly suggest having bloodwork done. It cannot hurt her (aside from the needle prick) and can only help you as far as figuring out what's wrong. Yeah, it sucks having to spend the money, but I can't imagine it not being worth it! We've spent around $500 in vet bills on Linux since we got him, a good portion of that only to find out there was nothing really wrong, but I wouldn't have done it any differently. The peace of mind and knowing I did all I can for my babies is what's really important. Remember, there are plenty of things that could be wrong that you won't realize just by observing her, that's what blood tests are for. If the tests come back all clear and there is nothing wrong that the vet can tell, then yes, you have to start looking at other possibilities of what could be causing her stress - ie. the new cat, other cats in your yard, something about the household environment, etc. Maybe instead of getting so defensive and yelling at everyone you could give us more information to go by, so we can discuss other possibilities. It's entirely possible that you may be right about the fast introduction not being the cause of Ali's current problems, but no one here will be able to give you any further advice or help if you don't explain the situation better...

Echoplexia I thank you for not being so demanding that I rehome, I did say previously that I only made the title sound bad to draw attention..

I can explain my situation better since you asked so nicely,. But if hear the word rehome again I'm not going to bother anymore..

And I do want to help my cats because in my experiences with vets they're not very helpful!

Well when we first got Lilith they were both 9 months old. At first ailura was very upset that we bought a new cat into the house, but by then her problems (her only problem ever was pooping on the flood/blood in poo) her problems had settled..

I solved her pooping on the floor by getting another litter box so when she got frustrated and jumped out of one she jumped into another. Occasionally there might be a small amount of blood visible, I'm still not sure why she has blood in her poo, it's only occasionally that she does and it's never much, I've taken her to about 5 different vets because of it and all of them have had no explanation no cure, the only decent thing i got out of it was that she had "possible colitis" and the vet saod possible because there was no other symptoms at all.. I had poo samples done to find everything was normal..

and vet after vet n the end I was told that if she was happy and healthy (which she seems) that I should just ignore the poop issue since its not really causing any other troubles.. I did think what a stupid thing for a vet to say and I admit if I ever have blood in my poo I'd definitely want it sorted out, but after literally 6 months of taking her to vets frequently trying to find a solution I just took that vets advice, I know it must make me appear to be a terrible owner but if I didn't look at her poo through paranoia I wouldn't even know she had blood in it. She is fine.. It does make me think I should consider a blood test, but the vet said she doubts anything would show up. All the vets I've seen, they've seemed to take thousands of my dollars to stick a thermometer up my cats ass and tell me there's no problems.

I'm probably going to take her to a specialist or something but am lost of where to go, I did get some recommended vets in my general area so I suppose a bit of a car trip won't hurt to get some decent advice..

Anyway back to Lilith.
So they Lilith never seemed too phased by ailura being upset, she just liked to hide in my room, under my bed or in my wardrobe. About a week and Lilith settled in and ailura accepted her. Lilith slowly and slowly became more confident, and when it used to be ailura licking Lilith, it was not Lilith licking ailura (I heard this shows who's more dominant the one that does the licking)

I assumed Lilith became the "dominant one"? From the very beginning ailura was always a greedy food obsessed cat! Like a dog really.. She would always eat anything,. Including odd things like rockmelon, cake, (I only ever let her nibble and not eat more than a bite) Lilith never seemed food obsessed, when we first got her she was rather skinny and didn't seem to eat much, she would eat 2/3 of her dinner and ailura would eat the rest. maybe she was still settling in then..

but as she has settled in more she has became more food obsessed and is more food obsessed than ailura. I noticed this when she would try to shove her head in ailuras food bowl whilst ailura was still eating and ailura didn't seem to want to fight back, but I've taught them to have manners and Lilith won't do that anymore, they still got along very well at this point and had no problems. They were happy and always had to be in the same room or doing the same thing, sleep together play together.

I always left dry food out for them during the day to nibble on. They never ate all of if! but liliths food obsession graduAlly became worse and I stopped leaving dry food out when Lilith ate more than her stomach could handle, they're small crunches but expanded double her size in her stomach causing her to vomit up a whole lot of dry food! Lilithe ate all the dry food at once so I had to stop leaving it out.

Ailura was not happy I'd stopped leaving dry food out and this is when I think the problem may have started. There was no food out so they wanted it even more, so whenever I did feed them they would go crazy for it. They are always trying to get into the kitchen, Lilith is always licking something.. A dirty (empty) fry pan,, butter knife ,. Anything with flavour!

I believe they might have food related competitive problems. I noticed this when one day (they were still friendly at his point) I was eating McDonald's chips and ailura decided to eat one, I gave her one, (don't tell me not to feed my cats this **** please I know it's bad it was a one off thing) and Lilith saw ailura eat it and ate it too. I was weirded out they never showed interest in them before.

The next time I had chips they weren't interested at all. So I think it was competitiveness.

About 2-3 weeks ago was when ailuras behaviour changed. She just didn't like Lilith any more? She would growl at her when she came too close, but it had settled from what it was and she will only get angry at Lilith when there is food coming.. I've stared to feed them apart from each other.

Lilith never growls at ailura it's mostly ailura doing the growling. However I did notice ailura "try" to play like old times but Lilith growled back.

The last week ailura ate her stuffed toy , I guessed pica? And they had human hair come out in their poo.. So I think the eating thing has became too much! They can't be hungry as they've been wormed about two months ago? Ailura will only try to eat the toys she absolutely loves (a squeaky beaver toy) that she always destroys so I get a replacement one because its her favourite

But since feliway I've not noticed them eat things they shouldn't..
I honestly think it is a food related? Competitiveness type behaviour.. But of course I'd still like your thoughts.. But not if its rehome them!!

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Lollo

Is her poo firm at all times, not easy to squish?
-her poo is inconsistent sometimes it's harder sometimes it's softer

What do you feed them now you have removed the dry?
- I feed them wet at night and a little bit of dry once a day, I tried removing the dry but I didn't notice a difference at all.. Apart from ailura sitting at her food bowl demanding I feed her haha..

Do you feed them more of wet food when you feed them to compensate for the missing dry food in the day?
-no.. I don't replace the dry with more wet food

Did you just remove the dry with no added extra food?
Without dry I give them meat more often

How do you make sure your cats have 'manners' like you said to stop one cat stealing the others food?
- I use a spray bottle to squirt them.. They've learnt not to try eat it as I'm opening the can and will sit and wait.. They would both fight for the one can being opened. Even jump at me if I'm standing!
But not with the water!

As for pica.. Ailura ate her stuffed animal. I mean she swallowed a good half of the thing. It looked like she vomited up a poo it was the same size and shape.. She also will eat rubber bands (the thick rubber wrist bands usually with embossed writing) and she will eat pretty much anything.. One of her favourites being rockmelon.. I caught Lilith eating a paddle pop stick once.. Can't be good! But she's fine.

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What about the TF testing? Can you be 100% sure that everything was carried out correctly as I've written. It is actually an issue seen in some adult cats that have TF.... They will shed intermittently and when they do they will have soft stool and colitis type issues.

Have looked into whether Ailura eats something different the day before she has soft/bloody poo? There may well be a pattern.

My cats love rubber bands. They love to chew them.... I think the eating part is pretty much accidental it's the chewing they love. It's kind of like chewing gristle to them. I just make sure they are never left alone with them and take them away when the start to chew... They love playing fetch with them as well.

You said that you used to leave dry out all the time but Lilith would eat it all and vomit. So you took it away. That's when her food obsession got worse... Your words. Plus Ailura is not happy about it. Answer is to give them another set feed at a different time to make up for it.... Taking food away that they were used to could have triggered a lot of issues.

Also, use the treat toys that dispense food one at a time when they play. You can leave them out when you are not home.

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Lollo