I have a 5 years old female snow Bengal and she hates to be picked up. She wiggles and squarms and does everything she can to get away. I should tell u though she was adopted from a breeder who had her for her 5 years and she is a retired breeding cat. So coming to us was a huge adjustment but she seem to take it very well and came around in less than two weeks. Any advice why she would be acting Like this?

Many cats don't like to be held.

You don't say how long you've actually had her - It may be that having been a breeding queen she simply wasn't handled. Or that she is still unsure of you and doesn't trust the contact yet. Or that she is simply not a lap / cuddle cat.

Give her time - It could take a year or more - and let her come to you in her own space / time. Pushing the issue will make her scared and could destroy any bond you may be forging. Once she trusts you, it may all change, and she could easily drive you NUTS!

Just remember - Slowly, Slowly, catchee monkey!

I have had her a couple months. She wants to be loved on her own time but once she's ready she is a complete love bug wanting to be pet none stop.

I have one that you can pick up like a baby and do pretty much anything with, and another who you can't. Eric is like a ragdoll almost, Pouks isn't even really much of a lap cat even on his own terms, he likes to curl up next to me for a tummy rub. These 2 are brothers from the same litter, they all have their own individual likes and dislikes

Both my cats hate to be held. It's normal.

I have one that HATES being picked up - in fact I spent this weekend with her at a show shouting whilst carrying her to and from the judging ring

Another will allow it but will moan a little, and the other 3 you can hold like a baby...no real reason for it

It's something that you can chip away at over time, but its pretty normal. I think more than half the cats that I've had have not been real crazy about being picked up. Both my bengals often immediately squirm and want to be put down when I pick them up (which I comply with), but then once in a while I get rewarded with purrs and a desire to just be held, so I keep trying, every day. And I think with more familiarity and trust, the odds keep getting slightly better and better over time that they'll "chill out" when I pick them up.

Sometimes the outcome is also predictable based on the cirumstances. Like when Serafina is all worked up and trying to get me to play with her, 0% chance she'll let me pick her up. But right after a long play session where she got all tired out? More like 90% chance.

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The little monsters 3

My two hate it - they love attention and will curl up on my like babies to sleep but i cannot pick them up and hold them - i get huffs from Evo and annoyed meows from nismo when i do -

I know they hate it but once a day I do pick them up - they have to be used to be holding them should anything ever happen to them (like when Evo fell out of a window, he's the worst for being held but once I'd got to him after his fall he let me hold them to check him out and get him into his carrier for the emergency appointment at the vets)

my two don't like being held either. they will mew pitifully when you pick them up, but they'll endure a few minutes of cuddling before they demand to be let down again. My two prefer to be 'loved' in their own time when they want it, they'll come to us, but run away if we try and get them to come near

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Honey is an ex-queen, spent 6yrs 6 months as a breeding queen, until she came to me. She makes her way in her own time for cuddles, will snuggle up to me, when the kids are out or in bed. She is a very affectionate cat but she dislikes being picked up.

At that age, if I'm honest, you can't really change the way they feel about being picked up. You may get her to a comfy place, where she doesn't mind you lifting but she will never be 100% ok with it.

safari HATES it and he is 9 months when i get home from work he will let me pick him up and give him kisses but other than that.....he will MEOW and CRY and stratch/bite like you are killing him!!! makes me soo mad but at night he comes and snuggles and follows me around all the time.... anyway i hope safari grows out of it but i doubt it....i just tell friends/family dont pick him up unless you are ready to be attacked i always thought safari was just very spoiled thats why he was winey about being held....guess hes not the only bossy cat around

None of my bengals really appreciate being held either. Also, female cats can sometimes be the 'affection on their own terms' sort. For example, all my male cats if I plopped them in my lap they would immediately be like "WOOHOO, cuddle time!!". If I did this with any of my females, even if they were in a super lovey mood, they would give me a dirty look and wander off. Most likely they would return two minutes later to climb onto my lap on their own, but it always had to be on THEIR terms...lol.

Bayou my rescue boy I got as an adult is like trying to hold a 15 lb wild monkey....I have never seen a cat SO adamant about getting down and he has some serious muscle about him. He doesn't try and hurt you, he literally just pushes away like a toddler with all his might. Its sort of amusing, until you get to the vet and we have to sedate him for a blood draw because even four people cannot hold him down. The good news is for him, he is a super love bug and even though he wrestles with all his might to get away, he has NEVER clawed or hissed or bit or shown an ounce of aggression, so all the vets and staff adore him even if he is a pain in the keester

My bengal gal I got at 14 weeks old, she HATED being picked up too when I got her. I worked with her daily so that while she still vocally complains about being held, she doesn't fight and struggle like a wild banshee anymore. So she is good at the vet and I can nail trim her no problems (although sometimes she makes a racket about it).

BUT, get this, the wild banshee girl now occasionally likes to be thrown over my shoulder. Its totally on her terms, like when she is lovey or sleepy. It only lasts for a few minutes tops, but I enjoy it. It started with me hugging her a bit while say she was on the back of the couch or a table. Her feet never left the ground but she got used to being more close to me. Gradually I started picking her up a bit, just floating over the couch for a second. Now, if she is acting lovey and there is nothing else going on that she wants to see/do, then I can toss her over my shoulder. But seriously, the second she sees something interesting, she wants down.

Shaping handling behavior on an adult cat is difficult. It took me years to be able to trim the nails on my adult boy.....well, its still a handful but I can at least get in about two paws at a time. So just learn what your gal likes, make interaction with you positive and never stressful, and she may surprise you with more then you were expecting over time. If not, she still loves you, she is just being herself

It so true about doing it on there own terms. I have a male kitten Bengal boy and he's unbelievable with cuddling he just sleeps with u and jumps on my shoulders. She has this little cry and she pushes away like a baby would and her heart starts to beat really fast. We just want her to feel welcomed we play with her 2x a day and when she gets really excited or she catches it in her mouth she starts to meow and purr for like 5 minutes then does it over and over again.

Our little boy Biggles will let me pick him up and cuddle him but only for a few minutes then when he has had enough he will start to struggle and I have to put him down but I'm grateful that he allows me even that small cuddle.
Amelia our little girl won't let me cuddle/pick her up at all. She hates it and struggles at once. I do pick her up briefly if I've been out for the day and haven't seen them for a few hours as I'm generally home all day.
Amelia will sometimes come and sit on my lap and go to sleep but it was months before she did that and I'm only allowed to pet her once or twice or she will jump down.
I can't tell you how happy I was the first time she snuggled down on my lap