I have another cat but I was told if I let him around my other cat too much he will bond to that cat an continue to be standoffish with me, he still hisses spits and barely let's me touch him.

Maybe you should let him socialize with your other cat, he may learn to become a bit more domestic like. He is young, the breeder was irresponsible and that poor kitty is the victim of unfair circumstances (not because of you but cus of the breeder). Let him mingle with your other kitty.

But in the mean time, I would really consider getting in contact with a local cat breeder or even cat shelters that have experience with feral cats, to see how they recondition a feral (if at all possible). Might even be worth talking to a professional behaviorist. You will need to ut a lot of time, dedication and effort into this kitty and keep it up. He sounds like he is in a very loving home.

I just rechecked my research and I've read suggestions to not let them around your other cats for that can reinforce there distaste for people and prefrence for other cats

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Lollo

The breeder I've got my girl from told me that years and years ago, when bengals were in show they weren't the cuddly types and were stereotyped as being aggressive. But she said that now, the bengal owners all sit in a circle with their kitties on their laps and a cuppa tea having a natter, during shows.

I agree with lollo, get your kitty to socialize with your other kitty, it's a start

F1's are not normal cats. They are essentially a wild animal, and need special care.

They are also NOT Bengals and should never be confused with them.

They can bond very ferociously with their owner or another animal to the almost total exclusion of all others and the person who told you not to let him bond too much with your cat if you want him to like you too, is correct.
You will need to put a lot of effort into this kitten to keep him "on side", never confuse him with a normal domestic cat, don't assume anything.

Not letting an exotic around other animals during this bonding time is pretty standard, yes. Domestic rules don't really apply to exotic animals, I'm afraid.

Living with a poorly socialized F1 is all about managing expectations. My mother-raised F1 chausie decided he liked belly rubs at age 5!

The key is to figure out your kitten's likes and dislikes - without having any expectation about how he's "supposed to behave" or that he has to live up to some standard of "normal" pet behavior. Does he hiss but not run away? That's great, you're doing fine! Does he let you touch him at all? Consider yourself lucky! If he hisses and runs away because he's scared, stop and reassess what you're doing.

F1s' prey drive and food motivation can be exploited for socialization and training. Doesn't like to be touched? Okay, how about toys? Feather wands, balls, stuff toys with the stuffing removed for safety, and the like. Many wildcats and F1s are into smells: fruit, vegetables, dead stuff - be creative here. Any a favorite meats? Butter can be a big hit. Figure out what he likes and use it to your advantage.

Think in terms of months and years rather than days and weeks here. I would also like to say that a poorly socialized and/or mother raised kitten (do you know when he was pulled?) will do better with a companion animal like a cat or mild-mannered dog. These guys have such a high level of social intelligence that they seem to learn from other pets that humans are okay; the presence of another relaxed pet makes them more relaxed. They can grow up to be pretty grumpy in the absence of feline/animal companionship. Think about what's going to make the cat happy, not you necessarily. Though usually a happy F1 implies a happy F1 owner as well.

When I had initially made this post and people started asking more specific question I tried to say things in the most positive manner possible, I cam her to get advice and the negative things seem to encourage the negatice people to start ranting. To be perfectly honestly the kittens pretty much untouchable andi feel things were getting worse and not better. I had a pretty lengthy conversation with the breeder and she said on top of the situation of her being gone for those two weeks, she has issues with f1s from this particular queen and will no longer be breeding her with the alc. She apolagized and took her kitten back and I will get first pick of a future male and she will pay for him to be shipped to me.

To be honest, i think that is best for the kitten and for you.

I can't believe that the breeder admitted having problems with these kittens but still sold you one in the first place. The only responsible thing is that she agreed to taking the kitten back. I assume she still has your money from this purchase, have you got it agreed in writing that she will offer you another kitten etc... I ask because i have heard stories before how you will not hear from the breeder again. I truly hope that does not apply here but it would be safer to have an email or even a signed letter to say the agreed solution.

I do know people with EG's that have managed to integrate them into multicat households but it can be difficult. Given that you already have another cat, it may not be fair to put them through the stress (nor yourself). Are you planning to get another F1? It maybe better to look at later generations or an SBT. F1's should be well handled from an early age and i'm not entirely sure this breeder is doing this.

I hope it works out for you, i really do.

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Lollo

The two were getting along great, the problem was how the kitten acted towards people. I have both emails where SHE was the one making the suggestion of a replacement and saying I would have first. Also I have a paper signed saying that the kitten was returned

I have to agree with Elaine on this and the previous posts. EG felines are extreme difficult and do require extra effort and care.
If after a short while you are finding it difficult, what about when it's a lot bigger and more sure of itself?

sorry to say, but I also have to agree with Elaine. Although you're a vet student, before you've even owned a bengal, quite an active breed in their own right and can take more than average amount of patience with some of them that get up to no good all the time (namely my two, one will get up to mischief and while I'm telling them off, the other is off doing something else), EG cats are in another category altogether that requires lots of research, patience, understanding of their generation and time. It's not for everyone and it's something you need to take as an experience that it might just not be for you. Just because the breeder says that the kittens from that queen were 'problematic' doesn't mean you won't face similar issues with other kittens. EG cats require lots of time and care, like I said in my previous post, members have posted how their socialising training with their F2s need to be done every day and sometimes if they leave the house even for just a minute, they have to start from the beginning. EGs are not domestic cats and need lots of time to build up trust.

My point is, if you can't give the time to do this or think it's something you can do, then maybe you should look at getting a domestic kitten instead

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I basically agree with all this, except that the difference between EG & SBT cats can be overstated. EG cats are still cats, just (usually) not cuddly, more excitable, jumpier, etc. But in a way it doesn't really matter whether you're wiping up domestic or wildcat pee. Cats are cats, more or less. If you're tolerant of a wide range of domestic cat behaviors and not one of those people who gets upset when kitty pees on the couch, chances are you'll like an F1. Keeping an open mind about acceptable pet behaviors and building a good-sized outdoor enclosure will keep yourself and the cat happy (most spraying happens outside, thank heavens).

Anyway, if you really want to go through with this in the future you need the breeder to pull the kitten by two weeks (before his eyes have opened) and to socialize him around lots of people 24/7. People such as vets, children, friends, contractors, the cleaning lady, whoever might regularly visit your house. If you can, learn how to bottle feed and give vaccinations yourself so you can adopt the kitten as early as possible, 6-8 weeks would be best. (This part is different from SBTs: you want the breeder to socialize the kitten some but not to the point where kitty hates everyone except the breeder.) Raising an F1 that will tolerate different people and situations is possible, but it's going to be a full-time job for the first few months - even with the sweetest wildcat kitten imaginable.