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 Post subject: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 6:14 pm 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2011 5:31 pm
Posts: 19
Location: UK
It is with great sadness and tears in my eyes that I write this.
We are looking to rehome our beautiful little girl Perdy, please understand this is through no fault of her's I just feel I cannot give her the attention and time she needs anymore.
She is a lovely girl who had a bad start in life and I am looking for a loving home for her. She has previously lived with other cat's so I presume if introduction are done correctly she will be able to live with another cat/s. She is nearly 5, fully vaccinated, micro-chipped, neutered and recently de-wormed.
She can be timid at times, so is a house cat. She's very playful once she knows you and loves to snuggle on peoples laps.
If anyone is interested please get in contact. :(

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 11:29 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Location: Leicestershire, UK
A couple of things:

Where in the UK are you? That may help potential rehomers.

Also, why do you think she needs more attention? Is she 'acting out' because she is left on her own a bit? I ask because it is very important to inform people of any behaviour that is unwanted even if you believe it to be because she doesn't get enough attention. I say this because the last thing you would is for poor behaviour to make someone have to rehome her agaib. It's important the new owners know everything before taking that step.

Why didn't she have the best start in life?

Is she registered?

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 12:26 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 8:08 pm
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Location: West Midlands, UK
Had a look at the OP previous posts - and I believe they only homed the cat themselves latter part of last year, this is a shame that your only reason for rehoming is the time you can give to your cat :(

Lollo is correct though - if Perdy is displaying any signs that are indicative to her being left alone its important this information is given so that anyone interested can ascertain whether they can offer her a home or not.

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 12:56 am 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2011 5:31 pm
Posts: 19
Location: UK
Ok so first thing I'm up round Manchester and second I would never just rehome her without giving any potential owners a full redown of her history and behaviour, I just wasn't willing to put everything for all and sundr to see. The reason I say this is this is because that is exactly what happened to us.

Thanks

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 11:33 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Location: Leicestershire, UK
But surely you would get people enquireing without knowing the full details. That may put potential people off rehoming her wondering what you have to hide. It is not fair on the cat to put her in that positition really, she deserves the best chance. I would imagine most people would appreciate full honesty from the start.

If i see that someone has to rehome a cat because they are not getting enough attention. I know there must be an undesirable behaviour that is making them believe they need attention. That's the way it works.

Is she a full bengal with papers?

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 2:02 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Tue Sep 21, 2010 10:41 pm
Posts: 2367
Location: Edinburgh, Scotland
lollo2304 wrote:
But surely you would get people enquireing without knowing the full details. That may put potential people off rehoming her wondering what you have to hide. It is not fair on the cat to put her in that positition really, she deserves the best chance. I would imagine most people would appreciate full honesty from the start.

If i see that someone has to rehome a cat because they are not getting enough attention. I know there must be an undesirable behaviour that is making them believe they need attention. That's the way it works.

Is she a full bengal with papers?


Adding to what Lollo says, if potential interested owners knows all about her, they can make a fully informed decision of Perdy and can make preparations for this if this is what they decide to do. Further details of her 'bad start in life' and whatnot can help potential interested members know what they can do to help if they can. Trying to keep it until you get interest might mean disappointment for you if they come to see Perdy and realise what other people might have needed to know in the beginning when they arrive, you'll get a lot of people leaving. Whereas, if you put some more information on here first, people can decide and the really interested members can contact you.

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 7:30 pm 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2011 5:31 pm
Posts: 19
Location: UK
I do understand some of the comments stated but feel they could have been put in a better context. This has been a very difficult decision to make and I haven't taken it lightly in the slightest. As stated in my first post this is through no fault of her own hence no behavioural problema as some people seem to assume too rapidly. My husband and I work in the same industry and have both had to take serious pay cuts and also to pay the bills we have both got 2nd jobs hence haven't got the time.
As for the comments of some people having had to make this decision and then feeling completely attacked and generalised by people, I have decided to withdraw my advertisement for rehoming and also withdraw myself from this forum.

I thank people for the advice I have received, but please do not contact me in regards to rehoming my cat I am looking into other ways to do this.


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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:21 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 1:00 am
Posts: 4109
Location: Portland Oregon, USA
I don't think it does any good to be critical of someone for wanting to rehome their cat (regardless of the reason or circumstance). And this includes nit-picking their ad. Yet it happens every time here. To me what is much worse than someone who rehomes their cat, is someone who doesn't but no longer wants the cat, and neglects or mistreats the cat as a result. Instead I think the best thing is to be supportive (for that cat's sake) and hope that a new and better home can be found. And if anyone is able to help in that regard, that is a wonderful thing.

I'm sorry PurdyPurr, and I do hope you are successful in finding a good new home for your cat. If I could help, I would.

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 9:09 pm 
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The Boss
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brianj12 wrote:
I don't think it does any good to be critical of someone for wanting to rehome their cat (regardless of the reason or circumstance). And this includes nit-picking their ad. Yet it happens every time here. To me what is much worse than someone who rehomes their cat, is someone who doesn't but no longer wants the cat, and neglects or mistreats the cat as a result. Instead I think the best thing is to be supportive (for that cat's sake) and hope that a new and better home can be found. And if anyone is able to help in that regard, that is a wonderful thing.

I'm sorry PurdyPurr, and I do hope you are successful in finding a good new home for your cat. If I could help, I would.



+1

Totally agree with everything Brian has said here.


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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 9:13 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Posts: 4129
Location: Leicestershire, UK
I was trying to be helpful.

Nit picking their add was not my intention but i have seen so many cats get rehomed time and time again because of behaviour that was not disclosed. It is so important to be up front from the start to save the cat from being rehomed again and again. I have been here for 4 years now and seen it happen on so many occasions.

The OP alluded to the fact that there were issues but she didn't want to air them on here to all and sundry.

It is very normal for cats to 'act out' when not given enough attention. Sometimes they mess with stuff, sometimes they toilet outside the box, sometimes they are manic and destroy things, sometimes they just seem sad and depressed. There is usually something that makes the owner think they are not getting enough attention. ALL of this behaviour is reversible when they get the attention they want through a little retraining and care. I just feel it is so important to be honest from the start. I also wasn't aware that the cat in question had already being rehomed once and that the OP had been told incorrect information from the previous owner... untill i looked back through the old posts. I am unsure as to why it was necessary to not mention it as it is an important part of the story that someone willing to help should know. It would filter out time wasters and find the right home for Perdy quicker to have the full story from the start.

I wasn't out to bash people for wanting to rehome their cats, i was just trying to make sure all the information was provided to make the transition go as smoothly and quickly as possible.

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 7:00 am 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Tue Mar 20, 2012 2:50 pm
Posts: 8
Location: Northampton
To be honest if someone was serious in re-homeing the cat/kitten, then surely they would take the time to find out about the cat, 'NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER' some people have genuiune reasons to re-home their pets, and its hard enough at the best of times, maybe take a step back before writing and just put yourselves in their shoes, it could be serious reasons to why they want to re-home, ill health, work commitments, we dont all have the luxury of working from home, or one wage coming in these days, but I am sure and hope that purdy will find a forever home, hopefully no more 3rd degrees to peeps trying to do the best for their animal

Well thats it had my say about it, but only joined yesterday and I did notice some comments quite scary and to be honest it would put me off if spoken to like that, as we dont really want to put our life history out for all to see, lol

I am homeing two cats from here, and they did not have all info about them, but I took the time to ask questions about them, if your serious in re-homeing then surely do your home work and ask peeps.

Wishing everyone well and all kitties/cats get forever loving homes :)


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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 10:20 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:59 am
Posts: 4129
Location: Leicestershire, UK
This will be my last reply to this.

I have been here 4 years and have seen numerous cats rehomed 3/4/5 times because people generally do not ask all the right questions. People want a cute cat/kitten and that's where it stops. Do not assume that everyone is as good as you about asking the right questions because a lot are not.

I wasn't asking for the OP's life history, i was asking for more information about the cats. This is about what is best for their cats really.

I do think long and hard before i reply. I am not a high volume responder to everything but i do feel after being here for so long i can offer some advice based on my experiences on here of seeing countless cats rehomed several times.

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 10:33 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:12 pm
Posts: 544
Location: South Yorkshire UK
Personally I don't see any critical or unkind statements in this thread. If someone posts a cat for re-homing then surely they expect people to ask questions about the cat, how else are they going to find out all the information they need. Even if someone were to post a huge indepth describtion of a cat and their behaviour etc people will still have individual questions specific to them. I really don't see why people get so offended and/or upset about people asking questions or offering advise, surely it's better to listen to (or read :lol: ) what is being said rather than just jumping onto a defensive mode. People are very rarely actually trying to be offensive or unkind and it just gets everyone wound up when things are taken as criticism and people take offence, or they get accused of being mean when they are trying to help.

meggabecca wrote:
To be honest if someone was serious in re-homeing the cat/kitten, then surely they would take the time to find out about the cat, 'NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER' some people have genuiune reasons to re-home their pets, and its hard enough at the best of times, maybe take a step back before writing and just put yourselves in their shoes, it could be serious reasons to why they want to re-home, ill health, work commitments, we dont all have the luxury of working from home, or one wage coming in these days, but I am sure and hope that purdy will find a forever home, hopefully no more 3rd degrees to peeps trying to do the best for their animal

Well thats it had my say about it, but only joined yesterday and I did notice some comments quite scary and to be honest it would put me off if spoken to like that, as we dont really want to put our life history out for all to see, lol

I am homeing two cats from here, and they did not have all info about them, but I took the time to ask questions about them, if your serious in re-homeing then surely do your home work and ask peeps.

Wishing everyone well and all kitties/cats get forever loving homes :)


Unfortunately people don't always ask questions or do any research even when they are buying expensive kittens from breeders, anyone wanting to re-home a cat should provide as much information about the cat as they can. This doesn't mean they have to disclose every detail of their own lives/situation but they should give all the relevant information about their cat so that people know what re-homing that cat would involve. I don't think you need to be someone who works from home or a family who only need one income to be capable of writing a decription of a cat or to provide the care and attention needed to own one for that matter.

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 12:16 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 8:08 pm
Posts: 2927
Location: West Midlands, UK
What a complete waste of peoples time this forum is if they/we cant even attempt to help the OP by asking one question without being lectured on how to be 'nice' *sigh* :arrow:

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 Post subject: Re: Loving home needed
PostPosted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 1:42 pm 
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The Boss
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Posts: 1240
Lacemoat wrote:
What a complete waste of peoples time this forum is if they/we cant even attempt to help the OP by asking one question without being lectured on how to be 'nice' *sigh* :arrow:


A politely put difference of opinion, nothing more! I doubt very much that Brian meant to come across as lecturing anyone by posting his thoughts, and nor did I by agreeing with them.

I think the sentiment of being sensitive and supporting any owner of their decision to rehome is equally as important as exact details of the cat and/or it's behaviour, if someone looking to rehome the cat has more questions to ask then fine, ask away publically on the thread or privately via PM. I can appreciate both sides here but sometimes new members can be frightened off by too many direct questions, and that is counter productive in the goal of rehoming a unhappy cat, it's a very fine line. Lollo has said she has seen numerous cats unsucessfully rehomed 3/4/5 times; Likewise, over my years here I have had countless new members make contact asking for removal from the forum due to the responses they received when trying to rehome their cat, which incidently is the most popular reason given for removal requests.

It's hard to see so many similar rehoming cases without getting uptight about reasons given, or lack of. Ultimately, whatever our opinions are on this subject we all share the same goal, and that is seeing the cat happy, contented and settled in a new home.

Hopefully, whatever questions are asked and whatever answers are given, the end result will be the same. A happy ending!


Also, just for the record - The OP has asked to be removed from this forum.


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