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PostPosted: Fri Aug 17, 2012 7:26 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Thu Mar 20, 2008 1:19 pm
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Location: Wiltshire, England
"Men's brains are fairly simple "

ha ha ha ha ha

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 17, 2012 8:14 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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thanks guys :D

lollo2304 wrote:
since cats can be referred to as fur-babies, my husband would like to know if human babies are know as skin-kittens ????


so funny! :lol: :lol:

and lollo you are so right in your last paragraph. i will try to slow down on the buying but i just feel like if he can spend his $ on fishing let me spend mine on safari but ofcrose he doesnt understand...men & womens brain and way of thinking is soo different :roll: but i will feel like im depriving safari a little :( but i will try to be strong. :shock: and thats great you get to keep another fur baby :mrgreen:

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 17, 2012 8:39 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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manic cats wrote:
"Men's brains are fairly simple "

ha ha ha ha ha


You are so right!

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 17, 2012 9:57 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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SAFARI MOM wrote:
thanks viperkeeper :mrgreen:

and maybe he has been feeling left out and neglected...but on the weekends we do stuff together...like sometimes we go out at night or do dinner...or a BBQ at his friends house...or fising together....i mean i surprised him with SAINTS tickets to this fridays game.. just me & him .( cant bring the cat there) so i dont know....goood thing we dont have any kids cause we sure wouldnt make it...a kitten is already starting arguments.. :shock:


Realise I'm a bit late to this thread and that you've probably sorted it all now (well at least I hope you have!) but thought I'd add my thoughts after reading the comments.

I underlined the a section in the quote up there (assuming it works when I hit the post button) about you buying him tickets to a game. The bit that stood out to me was the (can't bring the cat there) bit. I agree he might feel neglected and that all the attention is being given to the cat. The fact that you're saying "I brought tickets to the game and it'll be just me and him because I can't take the cat" means that the cat is STILL there in the background somewhere and that he probably realises this and feels a bit disgruntled. I realise I'm not explaining myself overly well here and that I'm basing a lot on one or two comments but maybe he feels that even when you're with him, you're still thinking about the cat whereas he USED to have your undivided attention before the cat arrived. Again, I'm just speculating here so I may be wide of the mark.

With this in mind and if I was in your shoes I would stop and think every time I'm out and about. Does Safari really NEED that extra toy or that treat? (Does he even play with toys? My two prefer the packaging the toys come in!! Haha!!). And if you do buy that toy or that treat... how about buying the boyfriend something? Be it his favourite snack, or a silly little gift of some description. Just something small to say "I'm treating the cat, but I'm also treating you because you're worth treating too". (you may already do this, I don't know).

What about setting up a date night every so often. Do something he likes to do. Cook or take him out for his favourite meal (males like food). Go watch his favourite type of movie. Whatever. Try and make it about him and don't bring anything up about the cat unless he asks. Although from some of your posts I gather you already do such things anyway so that's not very helpful haha.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 17, 2012 11:35 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Wed Apr 25, 2012 11:40 pm
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Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Make sure when your at the game to ask to leave early because you Miss Safari :wink:

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 18, 2012 8:32 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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neoow wrote:
you're still thinking about the cat whereas he USED to have your undivided attention before the cat arrived.


i know its true! anytime we go anywhere im always talking about the cat always wanting to hurry and get home somtimes to him and i know the BF knows all this and gets mad about it. i believe if i had 2cats i wouldnt be so crazy about mine because he could have a playmate but my condo is small now so no room for two.

and to be honest about toys....safari plays with anything and everything!!! :shock: i mean if a paperclip was on the floor he could have a blast with it :roll: but he really doesnt need the toys i just feel that its something he may like to play with while im at work...

and VIPERKEEPER i just DIED laughing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! soooo funny!!!! i think the BF would of killed me if i said that last night!!! :lol:

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 20, 2012 8:58 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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just a quick update!

so the stroller arrived saturday :shock: the BF was home and i asked him if he would put it together for me and he said HELL NOO! you ordered it you put it together he said he was agaisnt this nonsense :roll: ....so i started acting like i was putting it together ( didnt have a clue what i was doing) so after 5 mins of him watching me HE put it together :mrgreen: ......now if i only i can con him into walking with me :idea: :lol: :lol:

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 11:25 am 
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My boyfriend got very angry about our kitten doing a wee on our bed at 12am last night.. And even more angry that we have to get rid of his much loved feather duvet.. So I cheered him up today by buying him a (mr.men) "mr.grumpy" mug with some of his favourite chocolate in it.. He forgave me :D but I don't think he be so forgiving if it happens again! I asked him what he though about me getting a stroller and he said ts ridiculous and that "the bengal forums are getting to your head" if I were to get one hahahahahah


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:33 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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i told my BF i seen the stroller on TBCF and had to have it...he knows all i do at work is work & BCF. he said i also need to stop.....but he goes to fishing forums soo to bad. :lol:

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 9:35 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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"The fact that you're saying "I brought tickets to the game and it'll be just me and him because I can't take the cat" means that the cat is STILL there in the background somewhere and that he probably realises this and feels a bit disgruntled."

Great post and I agree.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 11:49 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat

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I doubt he is jealous of the cat attention, its more than likely because he thinks the stroller is ridiculous or the babyfication element.
Most people think walking a cat is ridiculous.

My ex gf was envious of the attention and love the cat got. She did not always agree with some of the more unusual habits in keeping a bengal, but its my cat and my house so....

Oh, never sleep on an argument.


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 2:46 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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gmcraib wrote:
Oh, never sleep on an argument.



i know you are so right! we seem to have done that alot of times. we are both hard headed :roll:

and i do love the attention safari gets because he is my angel but ususally when i walk him no one is around so its not like i take him places where everyone can see him all the time. most ppl thinks its a baby in the stroller anyway. & safari loves it in there and thats all that matters.

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 6:45 am 
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Asian Leopard Cat

Joined: Wed Apr 25, 2012 11:40 pm
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If you really want help..........I went through exactly what your BF is going through a few years ago. I hated cats and I'm allergic to them too, my GF loved cats and always had one growing up. She knew that living with me meant no cats. Its all about compromising right? So being the great guy that I am I bought her a kitten for Christmas. I believed then, what I know now....she loved that cat more than me. Vacations and evenings were cut short because the cat was "missing her".
Eventually the cat grew on me but I never let my GF know it, same as your BF, don't EVER try to get him to admit to liking the cat! It'll just make him show you he doesn't like it. Get him to bond with the cat in his own way, it WILL NOT be the same way you do!

In fact use the cat to fill the gaps in your relationship. Your BF will bond with the both of you more.
You need to figure out were "y'all" need "SAFARI GLUE". Right now its glue is sticking to everything and he can't get it off, eventually it'll start getting on his favorite things and ruining them.

You mentioned fishing I bet safari would enjoy fishing more than you and in a very different way. Your BF would love to teach someone how to fish and I bet safari would listen well and enjoy learning.
Give him space to try to figure out the glue. Don't stand over his shoulder and show him how its done or what safari likes. Let him try to use the glue on his own, if he makes a mistake and gets a little glue on his hat it'll be more of a trophy to wear with pride than a stain.

Let him try walking the cat without you. My GFs cat would follow me around camping, but not follow her :P that's something I missed. That's why Pouncey is on the next level of Kamping :wink:

He likes football so get a jacket for whatever crappy team "y'all" root "fer". If one is not available get one made. If you have to buy the fabric and ship it to Happy House Cats then that's what you need to do. Its still cheaper than that God awful stroller or fake nutz :mrgreen:
You can't tell him about it either! You don't want us men to give it too much thought........ You know what edit that idea...... but I'm leave it in as opinion #2. Option #1 is go full on custom get him involved and let him make the decisions. You need to approach it correctly. We're visual and competitive by nature so show him pics of Pouncey's jacket in the 101 and make him want to do one better. Remember this is just an "idea you have" not something your "doing" so don't push him on it at first, give him time to start thinking its "his idea" don't remind him it was originally yours. Its probably better you not like something about the jacket. If you end up doing something like Pouncey's maybe a different player or preferably a good team like the Pittsburgh Steelers :twisted:

I don't have the answers to a happy relationship. If someone says they do there lying. All I can offer is my experiences and what few thoughts us men have in our empty heads, if none of this makes sense to you ladies good, that's how its supposed to be.

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 4:04 pm 
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Asian Leopard Cat
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thanks viperkeeper i enjoyed reading your advice! :D

i must say that over here our team is SAINTS.....and i looked at our schedule and we dont play the steelers this year :? so maybe playoffs we will :mrgreen: oh yeah and the superbowl this year is in new orleans....just incase you forgot :lol:


but i will take you advice and try my hardest not to make our realtionship all about safari like i have been. i will see if he steps up to the plate or not. SAFARI GLUE...i like that :wink:

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 10:07 pm 
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Bengal Kitten

Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 1:01 am
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Safari Mom, is your BF a dog guy? Would he understand it more if you had a big dog that you took for walks and in the car for rides and had him join your BF when fishing?

Maybe he's missing some of the affection you show your cat (feels affection could have gone to him if the cat wasn't the apple of your eye).

At any rate, keep your attention consistent with your cat while you placate your BF. It's a rough spot that can be easily patched over without worries.


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